This is it...

Well it's tomorrow a few of us are flying out to join the team...I've rechecked my gear, picked up last bits and fully packed now...I think this will be my last post.  I'm not sure if I will have the ability to post when I'm out there, we only have emergency satelite phones.. for emergencies... so chances are small... but rest assured that I will continue to write my blog out there and will repost when I get back...I will be bringing a mascot with me but you'll have to wait to see which one I bring...

I actually wrote the post "Ressurection of the Royal(s)" a week and a half ago...

I've come to realise that although it was Royal that gave me the courage. strength and sheer determination to carry on it was something that was taught rather than given and it was all in the mind he was just a medium and allowed this to be opened to me.

I'm off tomorrow and I know I can do this myself, I know Royal's out there somewhere but he taught me to believe in myself, and I do, I have him to thank for it (**thank-you** Royal) but ultimately as messed up as this is in my head I do know that it's me that I believe in and I know I don't need someone to tell me I have it in me and that I can do it... sometimes it's nice that's all...

I'm finally mentally there, I'd never thought I'd get here but I am, there's no barriers for expectations and no doubts about my ability, I'm so glad I'm getting to prove this over the next few weeks... not many people do or get to because life gets in the way and it's a sad sad thought. 

I hope friends and family, God-son (Jamie) and God-daughter (Alexia) and who ever reading this can have the comfort to know that anything is possible and it's certainly never too late to do something you've always wanted to do, go get up and do it! If you don't expect then you won't have any surprises, but sometimes ... just sometimes, expecting something shapes your adventures and although I'm still unsure what to expect, I am sure ready to see what will be thrown at me out there.

Unlimited adventure lies out there for me and for all of us, waiting to be mapped out and explored...and I certainly can not possibly wait to embark on mine, when will yours be??

''Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.''

Mark Twain via Royal.